At the risk of sounding like Andy Rooney, why are nearly all brands of men’s underwear sold in the following sizes (in inches): S(28-30), M(32-34), L(36-38), and so on (another alternative I’ve seen recently, possibly reflecting the obesification of American, is for the 28-30 range to be called XS, 30-32 S, 34-36 M, etc., but the ranges–and the problem–remain the same)? What are you supposed to do if your waist measures between 30 and 32 inches, or between 34 and 36? For someone whose waistline has expanded from 30 to 31 inches, for example, small underwear would be too tight and constricting, but medium underwear too baggy and loose.

I’m beginning to think I may have to start going commando.