After five and a half days away, Jeff gets back to DC National late tonight around 12:30 a.m. He had Friday and Monday off, so he added two days of annual leave in order to have a nice long trip to California to see his parents and a college friend. Originally I was planning to go, too, but after all the travel we’ve been doing the last couple of months (New York and Omaha in April, and Seattle in May) and a potential upcoming conference in Montreal (though I think I’m going to try to get out of that), I just wasn’t keen on another five-hour plane ride so soon. So I ended up spending my entire Memorial Day weekend alone at home in a kind of an odd funk, never leaving the building (and only leaving my own condo once on Saturday to pick up the mail).
It wasn’t a horrible funk. While I did sleep weird hours (well, most people would consider them weird, but for me it seems fairly normal; whenever I’ve had a few days to settle into what seems to be my personal circadian rhythm, I tend to stay up until dawn and then sleep until noon), I didn’t sleep inordinate depressive-style amounts, averaging about seven hours each day. And I even remembered to eat and shower, albeit only once a day or so for the former, and only twice in three days for the latter.
But I wasn’t quite myself; normally I’d have been delighted to have three guilt-free days to game until I drop, but I ended up not logging onto World of Warcraft even once. I did get a number of old photos processed and uploaded, but I didn’t pick up the camera once over the weekend. Partly I think my current mood is due to a more general ennui; now that the move to California is starting to acquire some shape out of its former misty translucent formlessness, for example, even if it’s still a year or more off, I’m feeling restless. I’m so ready to leave this job I’m in, yet at the same time terribly anxious that I won’t be able to find work in San Francisco. I love my condo and Arlington, but some days I feel like I want to sell everything I own and just go there, right NOW!
But on top of that sort of transitory if not infrequent state of disquietude, I’ve particularly really missed having Jeff around, and I’m very much looking forward to having him back home with me tonight. On several of the photos of the two of us that he’s posted online, others have commented that we look like we’re very much in love. And I think they’re right. And sometimes it really amazes me to realize that.